PODCAST. Coaching and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) with James Douglas Jr.

podcast

Dec 6

Written By Dave

Welcome back to another thought-provoking episode of ADHD Wise Squirrels, the podcast that delves into the intricate world of ADHD. In this episode, we're thrilled to have James Douglas Jr., a therapist and ADHD coach at Mindfully Managing ADHD. James sheds light on strategies, debunks myths, and shares his personal journey with ADHD, plus he provides great worksheets and more resources.

Understanding ADHD with James Douglas Jr.: Join us as James provides a holistic understanding of ADHD, dispelling common misconceptions and offering a unique perspective on the challenges faced by individuals living with ADHD.

The Power of ADHD Coaching: James explores the profound impact of ADHD coaching, highlighting how it complements therapy and provides tailored strategies for managing the complexities of ADHD. Discover the transformative power of coaching in unlocking potential.

Cognitive Distortions and Reframing: Get ready for a deep dive into cognitive distortions and the art of reframing negative thought patterns. James shares practical techniques for fostering self-awareness and cultivating positive thinking, vital for individuals navigating ADHD.

Executive Functioning and Time Management: Uncover the intricacies of executive functioning with James's insights. Learn about the Eisenhower Matrix as a valuable tool for effective planning, prioritizing, and organizing tasks, essential for mastering time management skills.

Navigating ADHD in Relationships: James offers valuable insights into managing ADHD within relationships, especially when one partner is neurodivergent. Gain tips on fostering understanding, support, and creating harmony for couples facing the unique challenges of ADHD.

Seeking Support and Resources: Discover the importance of seeking professional support for ADHD diagnosis and management. James directs our attention to reputable organizations like CHADD, ADDA, and ADHD Coaches, providing valuable resources for those on the ADHD journey.

Working Memory Strategies: Dive into the realm of working memory with James, understanding its significance in the context of ADHD. Explore practical strategies for improving memory recall and active listening, essential skills for enhanced cognitive function.

As we wrap up this enlightening episode, James Douglas Jr. leaves us with empowering insights, urging everyone to embrace their unique strengths and unlock their full potential, regardless of neurodivergence.

Connect with James Douglas Jr.:

Stay Tuned for More: Subscribe to ADHD Wise Squirrels for engaging conversations on ADHD, personal development, and everything in between. Remember, understanding your journey leads to a life full of possibilities for Wise Squirrels everywhere.

0:00
So let's I suppose let's get started by talking about mindfully managing adhd.com. So this is your this is your coaching clinic. Tell me Tell me a little bit about how that came to be.
0:15
Okay, that's good question. So for me, mindfully ADHD came and started, after I started seeing a lot of individuals, youth, teenagers, adults and families, struggling to manage ADHD, and looking for parental support for their children. So it really led me to focus more on coaching because with the coaching, I'm able to help more people around the world versus just a state down license and for therapy. And it's also a little bit of a different approach than therapy. It's very similar, but really dialing in on ADHD. And I think with a therapeutic background I have, I'm able to provide overall support on top of ADHD as well as just well being overall well being in general.
1:02
And your license you said that would be in Florida. I see him right. You're, you're in Wellington, Florida. Is that correct? Yes. But from but from Baltimore originally? Yes. Cool. What brought you from Baltimore to Fort Lauderdale area,
1:18
actually, school, school and actually a job led me here. First, when I first started when I moved here, it was in the recovery realm. So focusing on I was just a behavioral health tech, finishing up my bachelor's in psychology and then moving towards my master's in clinical mental health and marriage and family therapy. Florida is like an
1:40
interesting state. To me. It's so I grew up in Canada, I grew up in Toronto, and Florida, was always a destination for you know, snowbirds heading south to do the theme parks in Kissimmee, Orlando, or, you know, that kind of thing. Is that was that your experience with Florida growing up to or did you? Did you ever get down there?
2:05
I actually didn't in my childhood, I ended up for my spring break, I came to Panama City. And I just felt fell in love with the atmosphere there. And I also just don't love the people. There was more of a relaxing location I was I was really relaxing. So I was like, I gotta get down here. And for me, it was a big transition at first. This was around 2015. I actually reached out to people on LinkedIn, on how to find a job. And what were the biggest areas were for psychology, mental health, in Florida, and they suggested starting in the substance use field. So that's kind of what led me here for position. And I actually, a lot of people reached out on LinkedIn, and were very supportive in that process. And some people even offered to kind of let me stay with them until I kind of gotta get on my feet to get my own place. So it was very great experience. This was like, right when LinkedIn was just starting. So wasn't as big as it was, but it was very supportive in that process.
3:05
That's interesting. So you were just meeting like for other professionals who offered a place to stay? Yes.
3:12
Wow. And so that's some people I worked with him in the future after that. Wow. That's amazing. That was good. Yes, it was great.
3:19
It reminds me of I'll date myself and there used to be a website called couchsurfing.com. Where you for like backpackers. I was a backpacker a million years ago, you know, traveling across Europe. That's how I ended up moving to Nashville is because I'm awesome. My wife, yeah, in Ireland and backpacking back in the backpack and days, but that's really cool. So people were, were really receptive that way. And so, so 2015, you moved down and you're working with folks in recovery? Is that right? Yes, yes. Okay. And I know you yourself. You were diagnosed at six with ADHD, right? Yes, I was. Yeah, at what point did you start kind of connecting the dots between or I'm not putting words in your mouth. But but as far as addiction and ADHD, goes, because I have learned in my short tenure, researching ADHD for myself, having just been diagnosed this year, the kind of correlation between addiction Tell me a little bit about that.
4:29
I actually wasn't really into ADHD as much when I first moved down here. It was actually more focused on just the recovery and addiction realm. And then that's when I started connecting the dots more in my master's program, realizing that people are seeing someone struggling with substance use, and other things such as anxiety and depression. But one thing I did learn when I was in the recovery field is that a lot of individuals are dually diagnosed with something else other than to substance use. So that kind of opened up my eyes, which kind of led me into the counseling realm. I had the opportunity at the behavioral health tech to sit in on groups. And watch therapists actually do group therapy, individual therapy, which I think was a big factor for me deciding counseling as the Masters over a master's in psychology, what
5:22
what was it about that counseling that made that stood out to you? For
5:26
me, it was the connection with the individuals that were in the treatment program. And just being that support for someone listening year providing strategies, and being in that journey with a person and then seeing a month, three months out, that person uses utilizing those strategies and growing from that experience.
5:49
I mean, it's a logical choice, you know, given given what we're talking about here, so So, at six, you're you're diagnosed I know, you know, your your family was quite supportive. Tell me Tell me a little bit about that.
6:02
So for me, it was the typical like hyperactive impulsive, I would say that I was more inattentive. And back when I got my diagnosis, it was just add, there wasn't the ADHD because now it's just ADHD, inattentive, hyperactive, and then a mixed combined type. So I just had was diagnosed with ADHD. But I would say now is probably, I would say inattentive, so a lot of children and youth wall, are typically hyperactive anyways. But I really didn't have like the fidgeting or anything like that. But for me, growing up, I was very into sports play basketball, baseball, football track. So that was a great outlet for me, to help me focus didn't really struggle very much in school, until I got to college. And that's kind of what led me to learning more about ADHD in general. I feel like it wasn't talked about as much when I was younger, so I lacked the awareness and knowledge of ADHD in general. Yeah,
7:06
it's interesting as it applies to sports, I think too, because, like, I can see basketball as a great example. Because you know, where you're, if you're playing like basketball, it's one of those sports where, you know, the players are, unless you're on the bench, you're playing constantly. Like it's like soccer, or hockey, where you're, it's like baseball, where baseball, you could easily like squirrel, and outfield, you know, as the ball flies over your head. At least that was my experience playing baseball as a kid. Tell me a little bit actually, you know, about how playing sports can help someone with ADHD because right away in my mind, I can think of, you know, being constantly active and being, you know, hyper focused and, and being in the zone doing something that you actually enjoy doing. All these things are things that I've learned, you know, about ADHD, but, you know, do you see, yeah, how you were able to excel at basketball because of the ADHD?
8:12
Yes, and I think it's a great point, you mentioned, I actually played baseball for a while. And then I think around 1415. So high school, baseball, I was always asked to play from the coach. But it just didn't have my attention and interest anymore. Because I think of a simple fact that, like you said, it's like, your only time we really active is maybe if you're the pitcher, catcher, batting, but I was always outfield, so it just wasn't catching my attention. So I kind of strayed away from baseball and kept with the more active sports and even football, you get a break. But it's not that big of a break in between plays. But basketball is up and down, up and down. And I played a lot. So being able to always be out there. My dad played basketball. So watching him play growing up was always an inspiration as well. But I did notice that it was a great outlet for me to kind of get that energy out. And it's good for all people in general. But I think with ADHD, specifically some form of exercise or fitness, whether it's Pilates yoga, running, walking, taking your dog out anything that can be good to kind of burn a sweat helps with a lot of symptoms and struggles with ADHD.
9:27
Yeah, 100% you know, a lot of what I've read is about, yeah, about like, as you said, like about exercise being a key thing, or just, but and you can, you know, yeah, you can insert a sport as that exercise. Certainly because yeah, you're you're achieving the same thing. So just keeping your brain going. Yes,
9:48
very true.
9:49
Yeah. Tell me a little bit about cognitive behavioral therapy. What is that and how does it work?
9:58
So calling the behavioral therapy is is a therapeutic technique. It's also a therapy modality. But it's also a coaching modality as well. And it's focuses on how you think about things affects your emotions, and feelings, which ultimately affects your behaviors. So sometimes being able to come in and talk to someone, to really be intuitive with yourself, and understand different situations in life, what you're thinking about it and how you're thinking about it can affect the outcome, which is how you feel about the situation or experience, which ultimately, changes your behaviors. So you focus on switching those thought patterns to something more positive. Or just another alternative in that, in time affects your feelings, emotions, and then your behaviors. Because a lot of times we have the all humans have cotton distortions. And these are things that are kind of put on two hours put on to us and also our, our mindset, from upbringing, family experiences in life. And it kind of leads us to kind of be or think that that's the only way to think about a situation. But if you really think about it, there's 1000s, of alternatives of ways you can think about something. So being able to open up someone's mind to help them explore other options, and other thought patterns. And with practice, that becomes natural. And you kind of forget about the older way of thinking,
11:34
maybe give me an example of that, like with a with a patient, of course not naming names, but where maybe they were experiencing something like negative self talk.
11:48
Okay, so what I like to use for adults in this is kind of like all or nothing thinking, or black and white thinking, or even magnifying situation. So say your boss emails you. And the first thing you think is, it's something negative, or it's something not so positive. So that right there can cause you to not open the email, start feeling or I guess the feeling of emotion would be a kind of worry, nervous, scared, and then the behavior would be maybe avoiding the email, not opening it. So you might tell the person, what are other alternatives? For this email? Like, what else could this email say? Maybe it could be raised, maybe it could be congratulating you on something that you did some positive work or something more positive. So once you start thinking of that, then your feelings about the email change. So now your your feelings are more happy, or more excited to see what what it has to say, which affects your behaviors, which would be opening the email when you see it versus avoiding it.
12:58
What if, what if the contents are negative? What if? What if it is that dreaded dreaded message?
13:08
Okay, yeah, that's a good question. So yeah, so what if it is, it could be that, but it could also be so many other things. So maybe this email was that way. But maybe the other five or six emails that your boss sends you aren't that well, as well? Or just even a friend or family member?
13:23
Yeah, I follow some of the ADHD, Reddit subreddits, I guess. And, and it's interesting to read some of message some, you know, commentary, or posts from people about their own experiences with ADHD, like, you know, like, they think their their partner broke up with them because of it, or they think they were fired, because of it now, legally speaking that, you know, they're they're not not illegal podcasts, not a medical podcasts, either. But how does one change their mindset when maybe they are blaming ADHD on things? And maybe, maybe they are right to do that? I don't know.
14:11
Right? That's a good question. I think it depends on the situation. But I think it's really looking for the evidence. So that's another part of CBT is looking for all the facts. Because a lot of times we jump to conclusions. So being able to look for all the facts, look for supporting evidence, helps to minimize that worry about a situation as well as. And there's like worksheets for this as well, that you can provide to a person to kind of go through questions, to find out all the details, because a lot of times we do jump to conclusions, and we don't have all the facts at hand. So I think taking that time and taking that space to really focus on other alternatives of why something could have happened or a situation could have occurred. And it's good to just ask questions too, so maybe getting reaching out to person reaching out to a supervisor or boss relationship and kind of getting more information on it before making that clear, that clear cut decision on why it was ADHD or why it might have been something else.
15:15
And you mentioned some worksheets, are these publicly available? Are these things you have yourself? Or cut us out? Yes,
15:21
yeah, these are public worksheets, you can find them there's some worksheets, like worry exploration. So when a person is worrying, maybe if he's dealing with anxiety and ADHD, or just anxiety in general, ways to explore anxiety, ways to explore depression ways to explore any situation by really narrowing down on detailed questions of like, what are the facts, asking questions like? What are the alternatives? What are some other outcomes, and that gets you to really think it gets a person to really think of other ways that could have transpired other scenarios that can transpire from a situation?
16:01
Yeah, that's interesting, because, well, before I asked you about that, like the, the idea of of reframing. Are these worksheets publicly available? You said they are? Or where would somebody find those, I want to make sure our listeners have like a way to, you know, to reference or define some of these tools and tips that we're talking about here.
16:24
Okay, so therapist aid is a good resource, good website and resource, it's therapist a.com. There's also a website called psychology tools that I use for worksheets, which has information on cognitive distortions, as well as CBT. And they also other modalities as well, for therapy.
16:47
Thank you. Yeah, that's helpful. It's, it's interesting, too, because I find I'm only speaking personally here, but I find like sometimes worksheets, I struggle with them. Because just, or I kind of go back and forth. So sometimes I prefer something analog. Other times they prefer something digital. Sometimes I prefer an app, sometimes a form, you know, sometimes just a journal. So are there different like formats for for this kind of stuff for for people who have, you know, preferences as far as like analog or digital? Yes,
17:25
they do. They have different things that have video videos, they have other, there's even applications that you can download that you can track your mood, you can track triggers. And this is triggers for ADHD, as well as just triggers for anxiety or depression. There's fillable, worksheets, there's psychoeducation. So just a bunch of information. People like to read about it. There's videos that also explain those things as well, as well for ADHD resources.
17:58
And, you know, I mentioned reframing now I've written before about I just called it, you know, changing your perspective on on situations and things. And this is really just sort of amateur psychology for me. But things that I've learned over the years on how to kind of reframe Well, I've learned that at least in psychology, it's called reframing. Right. Yes, reframing refocusing, or refocusing. So yeah, tell us maybe some strategies for for folks for that reframing or refocusing. So
18:39
the first thing is knowing kind of what you're looking for. So that's like, if you're self aware, you might already know some of these things. If not, sometimes you might need a coach or therapist, to help you kind of explore that. But then, like, once again, I mentioned in the beginning is practicing. So first, you have to practice catching up, you have to be aware of unhelpful thoughts, negative thoughts, and then you focus on changing those thoughts. And this is what the resources and strategies and tools kind of help you with it helps you first identify and learn more about the different cognitive distortions. And then you start to reframe those thoughts, that thought pattern, which time you start to, when you practice it, it becomes second nature to you now, because first you're aware of it, then you come up with alternatives for different situations, save those elicited situations a person might struggle with, you would come up with reframing thoughts for all those struggling situations, when you practice changing, and there's even worksheets, and you can voice it to yourself, you can write it down, you can take notes on your phone, but it's called a thought record. So being able to identify it, and then label the column distortion based on that situation. So a thought record that's interesting. That's a big one for CBT.
19:51
Maybe we could talk actually a little bit about executive functioning because it's something you know, I'm still learning about but It's a topic I'm really interested in partly because, you know, I just for the background here, and as a reminder, like I was diagnosed at 50 this year, and so I've worked for myself, I've had my own work my own business for, you know, about 12 years. And so I've struggled obviously, with the executive function without knowing what it actually was, you know, having never heard of it before. And, and now I'm doing sort of reflecting a little bit on, on how I've managed to achieve what I've achieved and get to where I am by addressing and finding my own sort of ways of doing things that I just thought everybody was doing. So can you can you maybe share, first of all, some background on executive functions, some examples of that, and maybe some ways for folks to, to address the challenges they're facing with as it pertains to that?
20:58
Yes, so executive functioning is something that typically you start to really experience around probably 12 to 18 years old, being able to manage your time effectively, being able to plan. But executive functioning consists of very many different things. And with ADHD, we sometimes we oftentimes struggle with this. So that's flexible thinking, working memory, self monitoring, planning, and prioritizing organization and organizing your day your work schedule, school, task initiation, impulse control, and emotional control. So here's a lot of areas that individual ADHD, sometimes struggle with. So effective ways that I like to introduce to individuals are something called the Eisenhower matrix. This is something that helps with planning, organizing, and scheduling your day. This is it's broken down into four parts, four quadrants, so you have important and urgent tasks, you have important, not urgent, you have not important and not urgent, and then you have not urgent but important. And these are ways to kind of prioritize, and plan and organize your task activities on work to be able to break things down into smaller tasks. So when you have 20 tasks that need to be accomplished with ADHD, a lot of times we feel like everything is important and urgent. But this matrix helps helps us to identify and maybe break break them down into smaller, more manageable chunks and parts. Yeah,
22:31
that's very helpful. So it's funny, I created like a to do list that was working for myself. And one of the things that I did so and I forget where I learned about it, but I kind of tweaked it for myself. And it's basically like a worksheet that I print, you know, six days a week, there's a Saturday version of it. And it's basically eight things per day. So I have like a list of six business things I need to do. And then two personal things. And then on Saturdays, I flip it to personal or to business things and eight, or excuse me six personal, and then Sundays. Yeah, whatever. And so, but one thing that I found helped, certainly for me, because I'm running a business is not to sound like all like capitalistic or like greedy or whatever. But you realize pretty quickly when you work for yourself that if you're not making money, you have no one to blame. So I found that putting $1 sign next to the business things on my list to help me kind of prioritize them to remind me like which ones actually, you know, somebody has paid me to do or will pay me to do, and that that kind of helped me but I really liked. I really liked the Eisenhower matrix. I think that's a that's a great, great thing. Was that by Mr. Eisenhower himself, or do you know? Yes, true at that?
24:09
Yes, it is. And I think what you said is, is phenomenal, because I think it's really about identifying what strategies work for you. Because there's so many different strategies out here and techniques, and tools to use, but everyone's different. And everyone what might work for me might not work for you, and vice versa. So I think it's really about honing in and figuring out what strategies work best with an individual's challenges. And then sticking with that, and if it doesn't work, then you try something new, but I think it's really about identifying kind of what works best for that individual based on kind of their challenges.
24:45
And I know you do, you know, marriage and family counseling therapy as well. I'm curious, have you had a lot of experience with your clients? You know, specific quickly for couples, like where one is neurodivergent, or our discover they are, you know, so we're, you know, one person realizes, you know, like me they're late diagnosed adult and they're married and they're trying to, you know, get their head around it, but at the same time helping their spouse kind of understand. I'm lucky personally because I'm married to an educator. And so my wife is pretty well versed in, in all sorts of different, you know, neuro divergent minds with the children that she she, she teaches so. But for others who, you know, whose spouse may not understand or know what ADHD is any any tips for that?
25:51
Yes, I think it's, especially when it comes to couples or in relationships or married individuals, I think it's very important for everyone to be on the same page with support for the person that has neurodivergent. So a lot of times, I've worked with individuals that will come in to see me one on one, but have some of the family component that they'd like to address in regards to the ADHD, a lot of times it's for support for themselves, but then also maybe for their children. So it might be even relating to parenting and parenting styles for their child with ADHD. But in regards to one of them, the parents having ADHD, and managing that I'd suggest and sin resources for that other individual that is neurotypical to review and research. Because, like I said before, it's a team. So the one person is coming to work on their struggles with their ADHD, but then the other partner needs to be supportive in that process, as well as just learning more about it in general. So I think it's, you're lucky to have a wife that isn't educated and being aware of what that looks like. So a lot of times, the other partner isn't, and I think that goes a long way with the person that has neurodivergent living and being feeling supported in that relationship.
27:14
So if there was like one, document one, Book One, whatever it is, what would you recommend that that spouse, neurotypical, quote, air quotes, read or or review or watch,
27:29
I would say first is learning more about what ADHD is. And that's just handouts, websites, PDFs, on what ADHD actually is, and what that can look like, what that could look like in the mail with Michael Vick and female communication, I would say it's a big one. So being able to focus on different communication pieces, as well as emotional regulation. So just understanding that your partner isn't doing these things on purpose. And there's a reason for it. And there's a lot of helpful tools out there from the website that I mentioned before, as well as just different ADHD websites that explain what that might look like in a relationship, whether it's communication, emotional regulation, reject rejection, sensitivity, and being able to meet their partner where they're at. I would have to look into different types of books for the for the partner that would say any book in regards ADHD and explaining what that looks like, what that could look like, would be beneficial. Do
28:30
you come across I read a study not too long ago, and I don't have it in front of me, so I can't reference it. But it was about the craziness of the misinformation being shared. This was especially about tick tock. Yes. Have you come across this yourself? And when what what are the dangers that come to mind about people's sharing misinformation or worse disinformation about ADHD?
29:04
That's a great question. So it talks that I think the top ADHD is in the top five search result when Tik Tok right now it seems like everyone is talking about it on tick tock, I actually personally do not have a tick tock. But I've heard from other people, a lot of people that have reached out to me for support for coaching, have mentioned that as well. And I even had worked for therapy company that had a monthly we would do, like just education, all the therapists would come and we would discuss a topic and that was actually one of the topics being misdiagnosed on tick tock with ADHD. And I would there there can be some good information on there as well. There's some social media but I think the the first step is seeking help from a professional whether that's your primary care physician, psychiatrist, and sometimes you can get a referral from your primary care physician for For a psychiatrist in the area, and really getting a better understanding of finding a valid assessment, to utilize for some of your struggles that you're having. But yeah, a lot of people were coming in kind of diagnosing themselves on tick tock and seeing what struggles could look like. And like many other things, ADHD symptoms can look similar to other things as well, such as anxiety, depression, but maybe there's a cycle of all three, or even more bipolar. So I think it's really first being aware of what your struggles are, taking a list, taking a note of it, and then reaching out to a professional to get further support on a diagnosis or just the next steps to take, if you are seeking a diagnosis, a lot of people even reached out to me, because they didn't know the steps that you can take to get an assessment. You can even go to a psychologist to get an assessment for ADHD, and also other things as well. But a lot of people are just misinformed of what that step might take or what that process is. So just being able to educate people as much as I can on I guess, the necessary steps to take to really get that official to that diagnosis. So they don't feel like they're in the dark. And the individuals can feel supported throughout their journey of seeking a diagnosis, which is more information about themselves.
31:24
I found, you know, where the where the challenge often lies is in access to, to a doctor. You know, like, I remember, I think I might have shared this story on a previous episode, but I would I like I'm from, I'm from Toronto originally. So I'm from Canada, and always had a GP general practitioner or family doctor. And when I moved here, I was talking to, you know, one of my closest friends, and I was asking him, you know, who his GP is, and he's like, my, what? And I'm like, you know, like your doctor, your? And he said, like our pediatrician, you mean? And I'm like, no, no, like, Dude, you're a doctor, like, who is your doctor? And he's like, I don't have a doctor, I just, you know, I'll go to a doctor from sick. And I was like, wait, what? You don't have an actual? I mean, did you take your car in to get an oil change? Right and get a tune up? And he's like, yeah, so I mean, and, and he was just like, No, no, no, no. And I talked to a couple other friends also mail and it was the same sort of response, where they don't even have a GP to begin with. Obviously, if you don't have insurance, then having a doctor can be quite expensive. And I think there might be some some level of ignorance like blissful chosen ignorance that like if it ain't broke, don't fix it type of type of idea. And really, that's the essence of a GPS, you're going not because anything's wrong, you're just going to have a look under the hood to make sure everything looks the way it's supposed to look and is, is functioning the correct way. And that's also where you could have a discreet, you know, confidential conversation about any concerns like, like, between my annual, my annual physical, I have, like a note on my phone, which I just keep, uh, not that I'm a hypochondriac or anything, but I keep an ongoing list. Sometimes it's just two or three things at the most, but I'll keep a list of throughout the year of, you know, man, I really need to get my vision tested, or I really need to get you know, I've got this pain in my foot that I need to talk to, because sometimes I'll get to my doctor, when I do have my annual and forget, I'll leave and be like, damn, I totally forgot to ask him about that. Is it Morton's neuroma? So I don't know if there's a question there. But any thoughts about about the challenges of of access for people? You know, because otherwise, they're turning to WebMD at best and tick tock at worst.
34:09
Yes, I think that's great. Definitely, like you said, get those annual checkups. And then making note of things that are illness that come throughout that time, especially with ADHD, taking out your mind. So you don't forget it, putting it down on paper in your phone, to remind yourself is great. And I think the biggest thing, if a person doesn't have a medical insurance, or primary care physician or GP, I think is seeking support from reliable resources. So there's a few that I can think of off the top of my head. So you have Chad, so that's like children and adults with ADHD. And you have ACL International, which is ADHD coaches organization, promoting ADHD coaching, and this really focuses As on individuals seeking support, or maybe even finding out what the next steps would be by talking to a coach that is well versed with ADHD, and has information on ADHD, they coach won't be able to give a fisher diagnosis or anything like that. But they can kind of lead you into the right direction, or even focus on some of the struggles or challenges that a person might be having with their ADHD. Because a lot of times people won't go for the diagnosis. But they would say like, I have very similar symptoms of ADHD, here's here, here's what they are, do you have any strategies or techniques to help with that, and another one's adda. So that's a Attention Deficit Disorder Association. Yeah, there's also a lot of different companies out here as well that are providing ADHD support, where they you can go specifically, get ADHD assessment from a psychiatrist. And I think it's little bit more affordable than finding more than on your own and getting the whole neurological test done if you don't have insurance. And then they can provide strategies and support maybe coaching or medications, if that's what the person is looking for.
36:06
Yeah, that's very helpful. And I do encourage listeners to, to do that, you know, I've come across other late diagnosed adults who have found they have ADHD or they think that they have ADHD, but have chosen, you know, they've made it this long, what's the point? Have you have you come across this? And what would you say to them?
36:31
Well, a lot of people that reach out, typically are ones that are looking for a little bit more support with some of their challenges. But I think if a person is managing their symptoms, and aren't looking for a diagnosis, and maybe just need additional support or specific things, and reaching out and getting that support, but a lot of times people have might already have some of these techniques and strategies and tools in place, before kind of getting that diagnosis or realizing that they might live with ADHD. I think a lot of it also comes with upbringing. So I've noticed that for me personally, there were certain things that I didn't struggle with, with my ADHD. And I think it had to do with just my upbringing, in regards to routine, and schedule, but not everyone has that routine or schedule as they're growing up in their family in their household. So I think you can learn strategies when you're young, that can help with ADHD struggles and symptoms. But then also, depending on the stage of life, whether you're in college for the first time, or maybe you get a challenging jobs, where maybe even a promotion, and now struggling to manage all that, then kind of seeking a coach or therapist for additional support. But I think definitely, some of these symptoms can be reduced depending on upbringing.
37:56
Yeah, it's a great, it's a good point about seeking out seeking out support. I mean, nobody. And even, yeah, it's interesting, like, like, for example, and I'm sorry, I say interesting way too much and relisting to these interviews. I'm like, God, I gotta find a different word.
38:17
There's all interesting, though. It is. Yeah, it's
38:19
very interesting, especially as I'm learning about this stuff, but But getting back to the sports topic, where if you play sports, and you want to get better, besides playing the sports, you need coaching, and you need, you know, you need a team, you need support you need, even if you're not going to go pro, but you know, like, you still need to improve up, you know, improve your skills, playing a sport. And in order to do that you do need to, you know, seek out the experts who can who can teach you
38:51
very true, some people will come and not even have the diagnosis. And just say I'm struggling with a new position with time management. I'm managing other people now not myself, even parents, they'll come in and say, Well, I have kids now. And that's when I started noticing my symptoms ramping up a little bit. As life first had my two little ones. And being able now it's like, I'm not on my own anymore. I'm not living by myself, I have a family to take care of. But I also have other lives that are I'm responsible for. So there's things I need to do remember, appointments, setting a nice routine for them. And I think when you can get that support from an ADHD coach, if you think that the symptoms are related to ADHD, or just anything that maybe a person with ADHD might struggle with. So time management emotions, regulating those emotions, managing their behaviors, maybe motivation, completing tasks, staying on task, task initiation, working memory, that's a really important one.
39:49
I know I'm being mindful of the time here. But let's talk very briefly about working memory. What do you mean by working memory and what are some strategies for for folks to improve their working memory,
40:03
or working memory, and that long term memory is something that can be a limited capacity for someone living with ADHD, it's something that definitely can be increased, we sometimes struggle with living with ADHD is to with our short term memory. So a lot of times things slip our mind. And we might forget, when a person is talking to us, maybe we were distracted by something or not really focused on the conversation. So there's ways to work on increasing active listening, there's ways to focus on how to put things into your long term memory, whether it's repeating the task or repeating numbers, or repeating the direction. And there are many different strategies in regards to kind of working on long term memory and working memory. One thing I like to do with, with youth and teens is it's like a little game you can play as you scan a room for about three to five minutes. And then you leave that room and then try to identify everything that was in that room. So something like that little things like that help. Yeah, yeah, that long term memory and being able to know little skills and strategies and techniques like note taking, releasing information from your mind, because Wait, the way ADHD mind works is they'll say, you have 10 compartments. In your in your brain, and a person that is neurotypical might be able to recall information a little easier, like a computer, like you're gonna computer you can type in a search bar, something that you did a week ago, earlier that day, a month ago, two months ago, and it might pull up pretty fast. But with ADHD, and ADHD brain, you have to be able to release that information to input new information. So having a nice strategy that works for you in regards to releasing information off your mind, whether it's journaling, whether it's a daily planner, whether it's using your phone for your notes, some people email themselves, I actually text myself. And there's also other programs and applications that you can use to release information out your mind. Because we, we have a lot of input coming in. In conversations, you're talking to someone, a random thought might pop into your head, or you might recall something we go, it's very beneficial to release that information. And, and also make a note to check that information that does come in when you are in a conversation so you can be mindful in your living in your daily living, so you can be engaged with being in the moment.
42:49
It's it. See, I almost said it again, try not to say, but it is it's fascinating. There you go. There's another one. I wrote a book a number of years ago called new business networking. And I have chapters on using, you know, Facebook and Twitter and LinkedIn and so forth. But then I have chapters on organizing your own events and attending conferences and trade shows and, and using podcasting as well and, and ways to network and grow your business and your career. And I mentioned that because the more I learned about my alert, really about ADHD, and, and realizing, you know, I have ADHD is that. Looking back at the book, I realized, like so much of what I shared are great tips, but they're really tips for people like me. You know, I wrote actually, I do a lot of public speaking as well. And active listening is something I talk about in almost every presentation. I have an acronym for the word listen, and I kind of break it out for audiences, and it's in the book as well. But it's fascinating to me how I've been obsessed with active listening. And without really realizing why I was it's kind of it's kind of fascinating to me. Yeah, well, I know I'm going to be mindful of time here but this has been just a fantastic conversation. James, tell me Are there any topics or anything that you would like to share that I didn't ask you about?
44:31
Um, yeah, one thing I think I want to mention is kind of focusing on kind of why coaching for ADHD and I think coaching can really be paired with therapy as well because therapy focuses in on emotions as well as ADHD but pairing ADHD in coaching together, where ADHD therapy and coaching together is very beneficial for any individuals. So I think when you find ADHD coach or when you find and someone that is versed in ADHD, you get extra expertise with ADHD, you get psychoeducation on ADHD, and proven strategies and tools to kind of help solve challenges. And a lot of times, ADHD coaches live with ADHD as well. So being able to relate to the journey that that person is experiencing, being empathetic and understanding as well. So the individual feels heard, and also accommodating thing. So understanding and accommodating for the ADHD challenges is one thing that I've realized with working with individuals, when seeking coaching is being supportive for them and, and providing that outlet for them in that shared experience to help them grow to kind of be the best version of themselves.
45:47
That's a great point. How can people learn more about what you do and and reach out to you James,
45:55
they can actually find me on Instagram, as well as LinkedIn. So my Instagram is ADHD under slash coach under slash James and I mentioned before my website is mindfully managing adhd.com And then my LinkedIn has just changed Douglas Jr. So you can always reach out to me all those ways, whether it's DM or email is also mindful ADHD 123 at gmail.com. So people can reach out to me that way as well. Well, thank
46:23
you, sir. This has been such a pleasure. It's yeah, lots lots to digest and and ruminate on but I do appreciate you sharing so many resources and and your own story as well, because it's pretty interesting. As I said, the word interesting again, if this was a drinking game, I would hammered at this point. But thanks, James, this has been great.
46:46
Thank you for having me, Dave.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai